Here I am, standing on the doorstep of a landmark birthday. Wish I could say I'm about to enter my forties. Or fifties. Alas, Mother Nature and Father Time are conspiring against me and turning me old. (Not as old as you might see if you do a Google search. Sheesh. Who started that rumor? Don't rush me!)
It's hard to wrap my mind around the fact that so much of my life has zipped past. Some of it has been hard, some of it sad, most of it good. But now, most of it's gone. Oh, listen to me. I'm turning into my Father. He spent years at death's door (in his hypochondriac imagination). I am so my daddy's girl. But, like my father, after facing a health crisis, I think I became much more aware of my mortality. Something I sure didn't think about in my twenties or thirties or forties. Somewhere around the middle of life, it seems, we begin to realize that we have an expiration date. And, hopefully, we begin to make wise life choices and start thinking about doing things that really matter and will make a difference in the world. I like to think that's where I am. It's awfully tempting to bemoan the white hair I inherited from my dad's side of the family or the spread of wrinkles or the fact that I'm beginning to experience some aches and pains. But I don't want to go there. I want to be thankful that I'm still here, that I have wonderful family and friends in my life, and that I'm able to do something I love for a living. And that my husband still thinks I'm cute. :) Instead of complaining about the fact that I'm getting old, I'm working to see my age as a blessing. So many people have their lives cut short by tragic accidents or disease or have their life taken by someone else. Old age is a privilege, and if we're still here we are here for a reason. So, happy birthday to me. Thank you God, for the gift of life. And when my expiration date arrives, thank you for the gift of eternal life. I am going to celebrate big time!
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I am now in my third week of dieting in an effort to shed the pounds that have sneakily attached themselves to my body over the last couple of years. For the most part, my regimen isn't so bad ... because I keep sneaking into the chocolate. (Notice which bowl is fuller! A chocolate a day keeps the grumpies away, right?) This, of course, makes the whole weight loss process go more slowly! And that got me thinking. Who's in charge here, my brain or my taste buds?
Taste buds are like willful children. They want what they want, irregardless of whether or not it's good for them. Keeping them in line is a real battle. From there I got to thinking about how easy it is for us to let things rule our lives that shouldn't. Anger and resentment. Grudges. Who really suffers the most from those? Me. Anger and resentment make me sour and very unpleasant to be around. Grudges destroy not only my spirit but also any chance of healing or reconciliation. (This is not to say if we have someone abusive in our life that we should stick around for the head pounding. Scat. But I don't think we should allow the acid of anger to eat up our happiness.) And how about jealousy? It's often tempting for me to look around at those who are more successful and feel a twinge of that. And yet, would I deprive another person of his or her hard earned success? Heaven's no! The problem with jealously is that it blinds you to your own blessings. We all have our own race to run. I need to concentrate on the lane I'm running in and not be looking around at the other runners. And I need to give my taste buds a time out! They are not the boss of me. Neither are those other deadlies. So there. How about you? Who's the boss of you? If it's something that's keeping you from being all you want to be, maybe it's time for a new boss, right? |
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